die. Horacio and Finn had just gotten back an hour or so before we all woke up and couldn't even function. Having a hunger in our bellies we found that all we had left to eat was canned corn and rice. It was breakfast. Well, we tried to have it for breakfast, but Finn put half a bag of salt into it. It was almost heart attack inducing but we were just hungry enough to swallow it down.We packed up our things and were sitting around on the porch trying to produce thoughts and drinking the last of the beer we had in the fridge because according to Haukur, "You never waste beer." when Javier comes over to hang out. He talked with us a bit, and couldn't wait to brag about how he cheated on his fiancee with the fat girl in the cabin next door. Way to go Javi, your fiancee was pretty hot too. Affter a couple of minutes Javier decided that he wanted to share his taste in music with us and ran over to his cabin to bring over a stero. None of us were enthused, considering a majority of our group had splitting headaches, but we were even less exited when we found out what he liked to listen to. The first selection, ZZ Top. Ok not horrible, but I happened to like the peace and quiet of the country and the music was killing the vibe. It got worse though when he took out his ZZ Top cd and replaced it with none other than Shania Twain. When 'Man I Feel Like A Woman' came on Horacio, Haukur and I couldn't take any more so we hopped the fence to play with the horses in the pasture.
An hour later, Javier was to drive us the 2 kilometers to where the bus was to pick us up, which was great becasue he had been drinking till 9 am and was drinking again on our front porch. But it wasn't far so we figured it was safe enough and we hopped in the back of his pickup truck and headed to our stop. After about 20
minutes a little white bus drove by, the same company we were to take, at exactly the time when we were to take it. The bus came by and continued on it's path without stopping. Nobody even thought twice about it. We continued to sit on our respective stumps, throwing bits of wood into puddles because our brains were too clouded for higher motor functions. 30 minutes passed without event when a thought suddenly occured to me."Do you guys think that was our bus?" I asked our team.
Everyone kinda stared at eachother for a good 15 seconds. "Yeaaaaa," responded everyone.
We sat for another 30 seco
nds pondering what it was we were to do. If nothing happened quickly we would miss our connecting bus in Córdoba and be stuck in the woods with Javier for another night. We had only one option, Javier had to drive us into town to the bus station and get everything sorted out. The only problem was that as we were sitting around waiting for our bus, Javier had been off to the side drinking Fernet and Coke with some friends that he ran into. We had no other options. We got into the back of his pickup truck and started our 10 km ride into town along a slick, freshly rained highway. Haukur had the good sense to get into the front where there was a seatbelt, while Finn, T Bone, Horacito and myself got stuck in the bed hanging on for dear life. As if it wasn't bad enough, righ
t before we hit the highway, Javier's friend pulls up beside the truck and hands Javier the Fernet and Coke, in case he gets thirsty on the ride home. We flew down the highway at 120 kmphr (kilometers per hour? Fucking metric system). We made it to the bus station in one piece, but my knuckles were white from hanging onto the truck.We got our tickets sorted out and ended up getting a better, more direct ride back to Buenos Aires. We had an hour to kill so we sat down in the cafeteria and got some pizza and water while Javier and his friends continued to drink standing over us. It was there that we met Carlos, the 7 foot tall, at least 300 pound drunk blind man who decided to top off the Oktoberfest celebration for us. Javier invited Carlos to come sit with the four of us and then subsequently left him with us as he headed back to his cabin. Ca
rlos was, as described before, enormous, and wore a complete set of navy blue sweats with matching T-shirt, which he was constantly using to wipe the sweat off of his mustache. He was probably one of the most digusting human beings I've ever seen, but God dammit he was entertaining. He would try and tell us everything he knew in English, which included singing Bon Jovi and Bruce Springsteen song, and famous quotes like "I'm sorry I am FAAAT!" or, "I like marajuana and women of the night." or my personal favorite, "My girlfriend is a fat prostitute." He asked us where we were from and when we told him we study in Buenos Aires he responded with, "I jerk off in Buenos Aires," which he followed by hawking a lougie and spitting it right on the floor. Oh Carlos, you made Córdoba wonderful. Fortunately our bus was ontime because after an hour with him it had gone past entertaining and was then annoying. We hopped on our bus and 12 hours later we were back in our wonderful beds in the Capital Federal. Epic.
